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Friday, January 28, 2011

a miracle... and a photo dump

so there I was at 4 am feeding the baby for the third time that night when i realized i couldn't do it that way anymore. he was in a pattern of waking every 2-3 hours crying. i'd feed him and he'd fall right back to sleep. he's slept through the night several random times in the past so i knew he was capable but he just wouldn't. the swaddling thing helped a lot for a couple of nights but then it went right back to the normal routine. so, i finally heeded the advice i'd received over and over again and downloaded On Becoming Baby Wise on my kindle. i made it half way through the book in a couple of hours. its geared more toward newborns so i was able to skip over a few chapters. i implemented what i'd learned that day and night and it had already made a difference. i was more confident in my actions (i joked to greg that cole can smell fear) which i think made a huge difference but i practiced everything i'd already learned with amazing results. cole slept from 12:30am-8am. he then ate, fell right back to sleep and woke again at 1pm. the book says your baby slept the right amount if they wake up cooing and are happy. i was gently awakened by the sounds of cole cooing and talking softly to himself in his crib over in the corner. yeah, that's right. i went back to sleep and slept til 1pm right along with him. i'm "catching up". he was so happy that whole day. the book stresses that they need to play right after they eat otherwise they associate nursing with naptimes and can't sleep without it which is exactly what had been happening with us. as a result, cole only took two 5 minute naps yesterday because he drifted off while nursing but he kept up the motions so i wasn't sure how asleep he was. he wouldn't take any other naps but wasn't unhappy and didn't cry once the entire day. i bathed him and got him back into bed last night at 12:30 again (we're night owls) and he slept straight through til 7am, ate then went right back to sleep til noon. crazy, right? i'm on cloud nine right now. he was happy all thorough the morning and drifted off for a nap on his own, not being nursed, at 2:45pm. ITS NOW 4:49 AND HE'S STILL OUT!!! the book stresses that a baby that gets the right amount of healthy sleep is a happy baby. one that sleeps well at night will nap well during the day and that babies 7 months old should be taking 2 one and a half to two hour naps a day. he's starting to stir now but there are no tears. he's waking up happy. i barely recognize this kid. he's always  been what i would call an easy baby but this is a breeze. i can now understand how some moms are able to do things like laundry or cook when they have a baby. my average meal consists of spaghettios or frozen popcorn chicken because of ease. he's only ever taken 2-3 twenty minute naps. EVER.  i ate what i could fit in. not healthy eating habits. especially for a breastfeeding mom. seriously, i'm writing a blog post in the middle of the day. i can only usually do that by sacrificing what little sleep i can get after i finally get him in his crib at night. i'm ecstatic!!

i've always been of the stance that mothering should come naturally. especially to someone like me with a baby-crazy nurturing personality. i knew the basic principles of how to raise a healthy and stable baby but the day to day skewed my perception a little bit. i couldn't see the forest through the trees. i always told my sister that she shouldn't jump up at the first peep and, while reading this book, i realized i've been doing that without realizing it. my relationship with greg has suffered. we never talk or finish a conversation or meal together because i'm summoned away. i didn't realize we had both become child-centered parents. anything and everything baby came before us. it explains why we've been struggling to see eye to eye for so long. i've always heard life with a new baby is the toughest on a marriage but i was a bit blind-sighted by just how difficult it has been. but, already, these past two days have felt so different. sleep for me was a big factor but we're both happier spending the happy-cole-times focusing on exchanging stories about our day or how we feel about things going on around us. guys, i have a totally cool husband. he told me a really funny and sad story that i just have to pass on.

well, he had to bite the bullet and go back to a job that doesn't make him happy. in fact, it makes him rather depressed. its only temporary but he still is in a tough spot. he's working in a warehouse with non-existent heat, proper bathroom or even a microwave. its a factory where he works with disgusting, smelly and rather dangerous chemicals and materials. he works from 4:30 pm - 12:30 ish am. he's got a few guy friends he works with but its not the type of work he likes to be doing. okay, so onto the story. you know how in prison, you hear about inmates becoming friends with the mice or rats out of desperation? well, my husband has his very own prison mouse. they named him franklin. he's still a young mouse. greg takes food to him and has told me several stories over the past few days that make me honestly grateful that my husband has a pet mouse at work. that's how bad it is. but isn't that kinda cute?

my house is turned up side down right now with the upsurge in cleaning i'm experiencing with having a proper amount of sleep under my belt and a baby that is content to jump in his jumper and watch me work. all of the upholstery has been removed from my couch and has been put through the washer. they're drying hanging from chairs, chandeliers and door frames. i'm considering pulling my carpet shampooer out tomorrow to remove the dirty snow stains all through our entryway. this is going to be the kind of night i love. i call it a good night when the machines are going. washer, dryer, crock pot, oven, dishwasher and, maybe, if cole is very good, the bread maker! i might even get some use out of the stereo. yah, my electrical usage is going to be through the roof tonight but it will feel so good to be that productive! can't wait.

and whats a post without some pictures (and a video)


He is due for his first hair cut because of a few random hairs but this one takes the cake. Its over 3 inches long and makes me giggle. It sticks straight up and is at least 2 inches longer than any other hair.


He's going to have drawing skills like Greg. I'm so jealous.


i just really like this picture; the way greg's arms are wrapped around cole.



no...i didn't let him have any soda. he just wanted so badly to have a taste and this made him happy. i'm an indulger and an enabler. i admit it.




we're inches deep in snow here. my dogs absolutely love it.


my dad is magnetically drawn to cole. he can't help himself. he finds that he's turned off at my exit without even thinking about it. i love it so much. its delicious. just to see the amount of love they have for each other.


hilarious




he's gonna hate me someday but i can't help but crack up at the poop face. we call it his "ruprecht face". follow the link to understand why. if you're in a hurry, skip ahead to 5:45. the entire clip is more than worth your time and the movie is an old fav of mine.



everything gets tasted nowadays. EVERYTHING. i kiss his cheek and wind up getting an accidental french kiss.


his toes are no longer the curly baby toes. in the last couple of weeks, they've taken on some independence and stretched out to explore the world. he has rather long toes so it makes a statement. i'm sad to see the tiny, curly, baby toes go but these are dog-gone cute too. don't they look more like little boy feet?






Thursday, January 27, 2011

Diary of a Mad Pregnant Woman: The Truth about Pregnancy

***I WROTE THIS NEAR THE END OF MY PREGNANCY AND NEVER POSTED. I JUST WENT BACK TO READ IT AND LAUGHED...HARD. PLEASE DON'T READ IF YOU EVER PLAN ON GETTING PREGNANT UNLESS YOU HAVE A STRONG STOMACH. ALSO, DON'T READ IF YOU DON'T CARE. ITS JUST MY WAY OF JOURNALING. ****



I'm not really mad. It's just my pun on that movie.

Pregnancy is, in my opinion, not the wonderful time everyone says it is. I, by no means, have had a hard pregnancy compared to some but it has not been an enjoyable experience for me overall. I have experienced the whole gambit of symptoms ( list to come because, what kind of diary would this be without it).

There I sat, eating the nastiest food imaginable. I always pictured pregnancy as a time where you wear the cute clothes, do your prenatal yoga and eat your healthy foods like yogurt, grains and the occasional pickle topped ice cream. I never expected to be sitting there, in my car, recovering from a dizzy blackout with a bag of McDonalds because it was the fastest accessible food. What did I choose to order, you ask. A cheeseburger for the iron to couteract the anemia I was diagnosed with, chicken nuggest to couteract the hypoglycemia I have suffered from for years (worstened by pregnancy), fries to satisfy the high-fat requirements laid down by my doctor, sweet tea to jumpstart my energy level and get some sugar in me fast so I can regain the use of sight. Pregnancy diet, for me, is nothing like anything I ever pictured. I'm being forced to eat carbs, dairy, fat and a whole array of other things I always disliked to only have gained a fraction of the weight the doctor had expected. Not to mention that I have worked out a grand total of..... once, this entire pregnancy. Each time I try to take a small walk around my street, I come home bent double with pain or dizzyness. I have sat down in the construction zone more times than I care to remember. Each attempt has gotten increasingly more futile. I really regret that gym membership I bought early on in hopes that I could attend those cute yoga classes and swim in the pool. Money well spent, money well spent. Now that I'm nearing the finish line, all of my online resources are double checking that I have been exercising, moisturizing, eating right, etc in preparation for that dreaded labor they keep telling me about. My answer to them, NO. I have done none of those things. Apparently I'm going to tear to high heaven, be in labor for 43 hours, push for 6 only to be cut open in the end anyway because my lack of working out has not prepared me for this. Oh goodie.

Speaking of bodies not working, all of you out there who have not experienced this or are not currently experiencing this, enjoy your body! It is so hard to wrap your head around basic actions that you did so often before they required no thought are no longer possible or are riddled with pain. Enjoy your exercise, enjoy your sports, enjoy your man cuz all of that has gone out the window for me. Now, before you read into that, I must say that some things are completely fine, don't worry, but the majority of the things I once took for granted cause my breath to catch with the sharpness or are completely impossible for me now. If you're lucky enough to get a sweet partner, enjoy it. Mine is sweet for the most part but he enjoys watching me forget that I can't get up from the floor like I once did entirely too much. Most of the time though, I don't even have to ask or think that I may need to ask because his arm is already there for me to pull myself up with. I always thought the pregnancy waddle and the warped methods of picking things up from the floor were overeplayed. I am now doing them without thought. When you have a foot attempting to kick its way out of your cervix or your stomach muscles have completely separated to the sides of your body, a normal walk or bend is just no longer possible. So, yes...I have joined the ranks.
At a time like now, while my self-esteem is so low its non-existent, it is so great to hear the words "You're so cute". Apparently that's the only word to attribute to pregnant women. I keep hearing it and am thankful for every single time. I'm not a pixie-sized girl so cute was not a compliment I'd heard much but I will take it while I can! I haven't felt emotional beyond the normal but there have been a few times where the esteem thing has become a problem. My poor coworker, for example, told me I was cute today and I didn't get the normal happy feeling. I teared up and blurted out that I felt so fat. I'm swelling in places that are bone...HOW CAN THEY SWELL. I occupied my bored self today with shaking my arms out infront of me so I could watch the flab on the back of my arms dance. I just find myself being an emotional cutter and focusing on the things that bring me down worse but I can't find the control button. Sux.

Sleep is a complete and total lost cause. I believe I have the strongest baby in the world. I have no one I can reference his amount of activity to as all of the closest women to me--who have experienced labor--have all gotten that amnesia thing I keep being told I'm going to get regarding pregnancy. This kid won't let me lay on my right side because he thinks its fun to headbang against the inside of my ribs. You're not allowed to lay on your back for fear of suffocating the poor kid. Obviously, the stomach isn't an option. So you're stuck on your left side facing your sweet husband who, bless his heart, has taken up competitive snoring as a sport. You finally find yourself drifting off to sleep when, Uh OH, your son had a bout of restless leg syndrome and mistook your bladder for the soccer ball you told him about weeks ago in preparation for his six-figured destiny.

Brain activity: BBWWWAAHAHHHHAHAHAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Like there actually is any left. I, at any given time, have a clipboard not far from myself with a minimum of 6 pieces of papers with different types of lists, reminders or plans on them. Nothing can be committed to memory anymore as I trust that place in my head less than I'd trust my dog to be my seeing-eye dog (Cami, anyone?).

The people that irked me before might as well be asking for death if they rub me the wrong way. I have not exploded yet but where there was annoyance before, there is plans for violent murder now.

In the end, I plan on doing this again because A) I don't want to have an only child and B) the interactions I have with him in the womb make every little ache and pain completely worth it.


Symptoms experienced:

  • vision changes
  • eye shape changes (contacts felt like razors)
  • bloody noses
  • nausea
  • dizziness
  • fainting
  • vomiting
  • chills
  • sweats
  • absolutely freezing from months 2-6
  • absolutely burning up from months 7-9
  • weight loss
  • weight gain
  • upper back aches
  • lower back aches
  • gum and tooth sensitivity
  • constipation
  • opposite of constipation
  • frozen extremities
  • tingling feet
  • leg cramps
  • foot cramps
  • big blue veins in legs that look like bruises
  • juvenile-like acne
  • increased hormonal surges
  • decreased hormonal surges
  • 3 mood swings to date
  • vulnerability
  • constant peeing (we're talking 7 times a night)
  • difficulty breathing
  • ribs knocking together
  • clicking sensation in ribs when breathing in and out
  • ribs kicked out of place
  • same spot of skin on belly falls asleep 10 times a day from months 5-9 (we're talking little needles)
  • good lord, the breast size
  • overheating easily
  • night sweats
  • insomnia
  • narcolepsy (not diagnosed but I'm wondering)
  • headaches and migraines
  • blackouts or blacked out vision
  • freakishly fast growing nails
  • freakishly fast growing hair
  • funny brown line on lower stomach
  • rashes on arms and legs (like very dry skin)
  • ankle swelling
  • abdominal cramping
  • braxton hicks contractions
  • cramping that feels like menstrual cramps times 10 (from months 1-3 and 7-9)
  • cravings
  • no appetite
  • raging appetite
  • klutziness (spilled Pepsi all over restaurant table and self last night and fell down stairs at least twice so far)
  • constantly runny nose
  • sciatic pain (dull pain down legs and butt)
  • bad taste in mouth
  • heartburn (not much so kid probably doesn't have too much hair)
  • all around stupidity (seriously, the brain fogginess is scary)
  • certifiably insane pregnancy dreams
  • nesting....OH, the nesting
  • insecurity
  • terribly low self-esteem
  • stretch marks
  • peeing in my pants
  • increased sense of smell
  • boob pain, AND HOW
  • and I'm sure I've missed a good 30 or so but this gives me enough to remind myself that I don't want to do this again too quickly.

Luckily, I have, thus far, avoided the following common symptoms:

  • hemorrhoids
  • skin tags
  • spotting
  • absurd weight gain
  • breast leakage
  • pooping in my pants
  • angry mood swings
  • irrational behavior due to hormones (I regret nothing)
  • hair in weird places

But, in the end, you know what? I'd do it all again. I haven't even finished yet and I'm confident I'd do it all again. Now, the question is.....will Greg let me do it all again? This has been almost as hard on him; seeing me go through all of this and being helpless. Poor guy.

Thursday, January 20, 2011

Awesome Photo Shoot!

This girl was A.MAZ.ING!!! I had a blast shooting her. She was a complete natural and a great addition to my portfolio!
Check it!:








Tuesday, January 11, 2011

Cole Birth Book


Saturday, January 8, 2011

love.

so there i was at 4:11am holding my tiny who had just drifted off to sleep after a long day of playing and cuddling for him and a marathon migrane that made me want to crawl into a black hole and die. two days, crappy sleep, pounding head and all i wanted to do was hold him a little longer. i found myself filling my lungs with the scent of him. that sweet baby scent that i could still smell through the apricot baby oil from burt's bees that i'd rubbed on his tiny cheeks after our evening bath. i was praying to God that this memory could stay fresh and vibrant for me for the rest of my life. that i never wanted to lose exactly what that smell is like or how it makes me feel. then i realized. this is being a mother. that all-consuming love you have that, despite pain and sleeplessness, you realize the gravity of a fleeting moment and things that don't last so you stop to soak it in. i don't know if its that way for other mothers but that describes my journey so far. i despise and welcome the next step in our journey because, while the changes to come will be beautiful and meaningful, the way we are now is ending. it goes so quickly. you always hear it but it never means anything until you witness it first hand. there is no amount of preparation for how quickly it goes. they can say it all they want but it makes no difference. you can enjoy every second but it still goes too quickly.
  i've always been a baby person. i knew i wanted them. i still played house at an age that wasn't appropriate because that was a way for my vivid imagination to put me in the place i wanted to be so badly. a mother. i'd cradle my doll and pretend i was where i am now. i am addicted. i'll admit it. i want dozens of babies. i always want one in every phase we've enjoyed so far. i'll always want a baby who isn't mobile yet. i'll always want a baby with the newborn smell. and i have a feeling i'll always want a baby who is just learning to walk, or potty train, or talk and so on. each phase is amazing and i miss each phase he's gone through so far. i think i'm gonna give momma duggar a run for her money. i want to have dozens of babies. i'm the next generations momma duggar...but with better clothes. now, to get husband on board and find a wealthy benefactor to fund my dream.
 love for me is striving to hold on to each second the right amount. i don't want to hold too tight but i want to swim in the beauty and details of the right now. it is magic. it is wonderful. it is life. and, mostly, it is love.

Thursday, January 6, 2011

Six Months


  it was there last night, as i held my freshly bathed and nursed tiny that i realized that life doesn't get much better than this. i noticed for the first time that he is really starting to look like greg. he lay nuzzled in my arms with his mouth slightly open and it struck. this feeling of familiarity beyond my son. he looked just like greg sleeping like that. it was a moment of pride and joy.


  i'm so in love with my tiny that he occupies my every thought. in a good way and not an obsessive mother kind of way. its always subtle and i like it. for example, when i think of greg, i now see him as daddy-greg (a gift i wouldn't trade for the world). cole permeates my life to add the most beautiful color to any thought or moment or experience. its an amazing transformation. and he is at such a sweet age. he is becoming more of a little boy and less of a baby. i so badly want to hang onto every moment but i'm coming to realize that each phase isn't something to dread because the previous one is over but something to rejoice in for the richness it has added to my life. its much like water. i hold it in my hand and watch as it seeps through my fingers. i want to hold on longer but that water has a mind of its own. sometimes, i try to squeeze too hard to prolong my contact with it but those are the times the water escapes too quickly. i get more time with the water and can enjoy it more if i let it flow and enjoy it while it lasts. silly analogy but it works.
  six months is an awesome age and i plan to enjoy every passing second. as i mentioned before, the baby stuff is already trickling away and the little boy stuff is becoming ever more present. he is learning and changing so quickly. last night, for the first time, he sat on his own. i pulled him up from laying down and watched as he propped himself up on his arms and surveyed his surroundings from a new viewpoint. he seemed excited and proud at the same time. being me, of course, twisting and reaching for my camera to capture this glorious moment, i made an oops and wasn't there to catch as he dive-bombed but my tough little man shook it off quickly and was ready to try again. this time, i preemptively set my camera on a ledge and used the remote control to snap some pictures so my hands could stay close.


  that wasn't his only first on his 6 month and 1 day birthday. during our evening bath time, he stood holding the ledge for a good 10 minutes needing no support from me. he grinned that toothless grin the whole time and occasionally looked back over his shoulder to make sure i was there and smiling too. he is so adorable. he also started mimicking sounds that he hears. my leg rubbed against the marble in the tub to make that wet screeching, grunting sound and he mimicked it with his voice. the more i giggled the louder he went. also, my little genius discovered that water can be caught in a cup. we have these bath cups that have 3 holes in the bottom to let water trickle through. i always fill one and hold it up high so the water falls in front of him. he loves to try to catch the streams of water as if they were strings. well, tonight, he decided that the water was escaping too quickly so he reached for another floating cup and deliberately held it under the stream of water to catch it. i thought it was a fluke but every time i did it, he picked up a cup and caught the water in his. and, i got my tiny to bed before 1am. that is quite an accomplishment as i've been trying to get him down earlier for over a month now. he is such a night owl like us that i didn't fight it too hard for a while but this last month has been dedicated to wearing him out to get him down earlier. it hasn't worked one tiny iota until tonight. normally, he's quite happy to go to bed at 2am or sometimes later. i think he waits for greg to get home at 1:30am and then he's okay to be put to sleep. not tonight though. we played and played hard and it paid off. either that or he has a concussion from falling down during our sitting escapade. kidding but what a horrible thought.


  this last month held his first christmas, first snow, first vaccination (the evil DTaP) which he handled extremely well, and a case of thrush. christmas was right out of a fairy tale. we've been so blessed with the people in our lives. and all of them love cole so much that they couldn't control the spending when it came to christmas presents. he got spoiled rotten. we have no shortage of clothes or toys. in fact, i had to buy more storage and shelving to contain it all.
  his six month check up yielded some surprising results. he's now a whopping 13.2 pounds. he is weighing in the 0 percentile but its nothing to worry about as he is steadily gaining. to look at the kid, i can't understand how he can only be 0 percentile. kid is definitely lean but he's got plenty of padding. his little wrists look like he had rubberbands around them in the womb that never got removed ( a point of extreme cuteness). he is now only in the 85th percentile for height so he's slowing down a bit in the length department. due to lack of insurance, this was his first appointment since 3 months. the doctor, part way through, asked how the food was going. i honestly hadn't realized he had expected us to start doing that yet. we hadn't seen him in so long. my research has made me glad i didn't start him earlier as they aren't ideally capable to handle food until six months old. now that we have started, i can tell that he's really gaining quickly. his chubby cheeks have gotten even chubbier.


  they say that when your child starts to show interest in what you're eating that its time to start them on something more than milk. cole started following the trail of our forks at around five and a half months of age. he'd watch us dip our utensil into the food and watch it make its way into our mouth, and repeat. i felt so bad and it was that week that the doctor gave us the order to start solid food. mom and i trucked our way to the nearest target and bought infant rice cereal. the next day, i mixed it with breastmilk to the instructed consistency, set up the video camera on our tripod and giggled our way through his first feeding. greg and i both got to feed him. before his first bite, i set the bowl down on the table next to him to get myself situated and hit record on the camera and when i looked, he was straining his face toward the bowl with his mouth wide open. this kid instinctively knew that was for him and to open wide. he was a champ. a natural if you will. and, with parents like us, i'm not surprised. he gobbled down the entire bowl and was obviously hungry for more. i resisted the temptation to give him more so i could monitor his adjustment to food closely. you never know if your kid will react to something. no reactions at all. the next day i gave him his evening bowl of cereal but upped the amount of cereal to milk so it would be a little thicker and easier to feed. bad move. it was too much too quickly and the poor kid got constipated. 4 and a half days later, we got a poop. thankfully i hadn't fed him any more after that second bowl. i had just been recommended by our pediatrician to go get some baby apple juice, pureed prunes and glycerin suppositories to try in that order with 6 hours in between each to see if we could get some results. i fed cole and started to get him ready to go to the store. i always talk to him as his reactions make for some scintillating conversation. i mentioned that i was headed to the store for some suppositories and within 30 seconds, i got the poop face. kid knew his options and that pooping was the easiest one out of all of them. personally, i'd have enjoyed some sugary apple juice before giving in but he saved me a trip on snowy roads.

i took pictures of cole's first feeding but i can't find my backup camera at the moment so i'll have to come back and add in the pictures from his first feeding. If you want to see 'em, check back some other time. :(

  i feel safe saying that cole sleeps through the night (knock on wood). its been a few weeks now that he has slept 6+ hours each night in his crib in our room. then he wakes up to eat for an hour and goes back down snuggled in bed next to me for 2-3 more. most nights we get 9 or more hours of actual sleep.    i. am. grateful.  can i hear an amen?!  one morning, i woke up to check on him and he had done his back arch thing and his butt was resting on the side of his sleep positioner thing. so, i repositioned him and went back to sleep. the next night i decided he'd outgrown it so i took it out. he woke up every five minutes until i put that thing back in. i keep the two bump things pretty close together so he is snuggled tightly between them. i think it makes him feel like he's being held. now i just get up a few extra times to check on him but nothing like that has happened in the couple of weeks since the first time.


  we have a tiny case of thrush going on. for those of you that don't know, thrush is basically yeast. gross, right? but, i have been reassured by his doctor, my obstetrician and my research that it isn't from a lack of hygiene on my part. i've actually been paranoid about this particular infection since birth so i over clean myself and even wear loose shirts and go braless at night because yeast thrives in moist dark places. short of sitting in my front yard topless under the sun, there isn't anything else i could have done. i boil his pacifiers obsessively anyway. some bodies just produce more yeast. it could be that he is a thumb sucker. another theory is that his antibodies were fighting down his normal bacteria because of the flu that i had. bacteria and yeast keep each other in check so when one gets out of balance, the other one grows rampant. that seems most likely to me. anyway, as of the 17th, the doctor wasn't concerned about the tiny white spots on the inside of his lip. since then, its gotten a bit worse but doesn't seem to bother him. the bad part is that he's given it to me. it comes with a considerable amount of pain as well as a decrease in milk supply. oh goody. i had to supplement with formula to mix with his once-a-day cereal feeding because i couldn't get any out with my cheap pump. i'm going to set my alarm nightly to get up mid-way through that 6 hour stretch of sleep to pump. the more they eat, the more you make. plus, that will give me enough milk to use with his cereal the next night. win, win...except for the sleep issue. thank God i'm a stay at home mom right now.

  not much else to report, other than that he is going off to college next week. kidding. crazy fast.

now, for my letter to cole:

Dear bubba,

  you are so cool! i mean like, way too cool for words. you are so easy on me. you are the type of baby every girl should get for their first. you're so good at making me smile when it really should be the other way around. you do smile for absolutely everything though. you're favorite things to make you smile are clapping rapidly and when mommy makes surprised sounds. something about that quick intake of breath gets you going. when i shower, you play happily on the floor. when i cook, you decide to take your naps. when i'm tired, you snuggle close and take a nap too. when i'm stressed, you do something extra special to make me smile, laugh and stop to enjoy you. sometimes i get so preoccupied with chores that i miss moments that should be spent loving on you. you've held true to your genes meaning you're a world-class snuggler. oh they're so delicious. i wish i could bottle your snuggles up and distribute it to the world. thats a true solution for world peace.
  you are so smart. i can see you learning before my eyes. you're also getting so confident and strong. when you get curious about something, you find out what you want. you're curious what the lambs feel like on your swing's mobile so you bolt your hand out and grasp with no hesitation. everything you do, you do on purpose now.


  you love to roll around. i tease that you're my little mexican jumping bean. you happily flip flop back and forth and sometimes, you get on a roll and keep going til you reach your destination. you're surprisingly fast too. it takes you a few seconds to roll from one side of the blanket to the other. there is no turning my back for a second.

  you're favorite gadgets are still your swing which is a fool-proof way to keep you happy for 15 minutes and often to put you to sleep. you love your time spent in your baby einstein activity jumper. your feet touch more surface than just the toe skimming you've been doing up til now, resulting in one bouncing baby. while i mention these expensive gadgets, you're perfectly happy to play on the floor. you're happy with a few noise maker toys around you or just my face close.
   you still don't care much for tv except football...much to daddy's pleasure. i don't know if its the big green field or the cheering crowds but you love to watch it. its something you and daddy can do together so, as much as i'm jealous, i use that time to get stuff done and allow 'guy time' to commence. i'm happiest when its all over though because you're back to wanting nothing but me. what can i say? i'm addicted.
  my guilty pleasure used to be chocolate but now, its your toes. they are so adorable and even expressive. you splay them out when you're excited or happy and curl them in close when its snuggle time or you're being tickled. its winter so i try to keep them bundled up but, now and then, i have to slip them out of their tiny socks to nuzzle my nose under your toes. they're long and flexible so you curl them around my nose or fingers. and, as you're not walking and the only thing your tiny feet touch is the inside of a clean sock, i sometime steal smooches. so delicious.


  who are you at 1/2 of a year old? you are the sunshine that makes me eager to soak in the rays. you are the reason for being for daddy and me. you are the love of every one's life. you are curious, joyful, content, lovable and beautiful. you are my morning kisses and my nighttime snuggles. you are my inspiration for creativity, beauty and adventure. you are my cole baby.
  thanks for all of the smiles, warm moments and happy memories. i love you to pieces!

love forever, 
mommy love

Saturday, January 1, 2011

January Goals

1. Organize basement so when I put away the xmas stuff, it will go in its proper spot instead of crammed ontop of the Valentine's day stuff which I will grumpily muscle out in a month or so.

2. find a kid to babysit in my home to supplement income

3. incorporate some kind of exercise 4 times a week to keep heart from shutting down

4. drink more water

5.  work on the "about us" page of my blog so it will include some actual stuff about us; including--but not limited to--how we met, a glimpse into who we are and pictures of the place where our 'meet-cute' took place.

6. finish editing shoots I did around christmas

7. get started on the business aspect of valerie sadler photography meaning portfolio design, business cards, etc

8. move all contents of upstairs office to basement office to make room for cole's abundant christmas toys

9. cook at home more

10. if i have any available time after all of the above, get started on cole's one year photo book. on january 3rd we'll be half way to the time i want to have it completed and printed.



Let's see how we did with December's ....shall we?

december goals
1. make and Mail Xmas cards   didn't end up doing

2. make Xmas photo gifts  
3. get all xmas decorations up in the first week (I did Halloween's on Halloween...oops)
4. cut down to one sweet treat a week
5. eat more vegetables
6. incorporate brown rice and whole grains into 2 meals a day
7. get artwork hung up in nursery
8. get Father in law to come over and put in both ceiling fans so I can FINALLY take "Nursery Reveal" pictures  we got one in so we're half way there
9. make deals with as many people as possible to not exchange any gifts other than bear hugs



p.s. new year's resolution......BLOG MORE OFTEN

About Me

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I'm a new wife and an even newer mom. I have a secret dream to be super-mom. I love to craft, cook, dance and fill my life with as many adventures as possible. I'm slightly crunchy granola but enjoy a good steak. I'm right brained and type B (with some type A tendencies). I thrive best when I get to use my creative juices. I dabble in photography and party planning. I play piano and have a dream to learn the cello. I want to make the most of this one, short life I find myself living.

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About This Blog

This blog was originally intended to be a personal journal of my pregnancy journey and all that that entails--shared with only a few close family members. It was a way for me to keep them posted on all things baby and occasionally post a picture of my growing torso so they could see the progress. After several posts, I started to get hooked on other blogs and became motivated to attempt to do more with mine. We'll see how it goes....







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